Enough

  

   Monday: laundry 

  Tuesday: mending/sewing

  Wednesday: baking

  Thursday: shopping 

  Friday: cleaning

  Saturday and Sunday: catch-up

  The list plays through my head as I roll over and go back to sleep. It's a Monday morning and I really don't want to get up and start the day. 

  But then, my baby needs me, my husband is saying goodbye as he leaves for work, my "tumbly" gets a bit "rumbly" (as Pooh would say). So my day begins. 

  I really do enjoy almost everything about keeping house. But, when I get behind, I start to feel at odds with the world. Jasper gets fussy and I feel like sitting and browsing Pinterest a lot more than taking care of the to-do list lying on the table.

  In my happy dreamy moments I picture:

• beautiful meals being set on the table every night

• good conversation with my husband after he's done with work

• a few of those crafts being finished and displayed around my house

• having a friend over for tea and scones

  

  "So how do you do it?" I asked a friend the other day. "How do you, as a mother of a baby as well as older children, keep up with all the things that need to be done?" 

  

  "I'm learning to lower my expectations."

  I have often treasured the wisdom this friend has shared with me. How did she know that's exactly what I need to learn for myself? But how do I lower the expectations in my dreamy far away world where everything happens beautifully and in perfect order? 

  "I feel like a failure" I tell my husband in the quiet of our bedroom.

  "Of course you are." This came as a gentle poke in my chest from God. 

  "Without Me, you will never be able to do or be enough."

  My somersaulted heart stopped feeling self pity and listened. The words made sense. The whole world made a bit more sense. Without God, all the lists I was trying to follow were shallow and meaningless. My cute little home had no purpose. No wonder I felt the way I did! 

  I am not enough

  I can't keep a perfect home, 

  a perfect life

  and 

  that

  is

  okay!

  After that little talk with God, I felt so much freedom. Because of Him, I am loved and my life has purpose. 

  What are ways that you remember this in your every day life?